I understand how dark it gets inside your own head. I get angry sometimes, selfishly I might add, that Elliott is gone but I understand. The only thing bigger than his are my own. His lyrics are the biggest connection I've ever had to how I truly feel. His songs have been the connection to that screaming voice inside of me that would torment me and from time to time still does. You see, Elliott's music may have saved my life. This is harder than I thought it was going to be. I particularly liked hearing him play Strung Out Again, Fond Farewell, and Plain Clothes Man. The song selections were perfect, all my favorites. Trying to speak to them and not being able to really say much to them that was coherent made me feel all locked inside myself again. The sounds of beauty and tragedy at the same time. I survived them both.Įlliott made me cry listening to this.
So, there were times when I did use something and times I didn't. I remember being absolutely positive that if I walked out in front of that crowd in the state of mind I was in I would somehow not survive it or.just something really bad would happen. I remember trying to get onstage for the first time, or couple of times, after a fresh rehab stay and being terrified and consumed with fear - still half-sick(or not half-right) and feeling like I REALLY needed something to calm me down a little.
I absolutely love Elliott's music but this show hit REALLY close to home for me. And I want to make it clear that the only qualifications I have for my opinions are the facts that a) I'm a touring musician and b) struggle with depression, alcoholism and addiction - so, I connect with this in those two ways. I purposely listened to this show first to, I don't know, I guess to try to get a sense of where his head was at at this time. I thought for a long time trying to decide if I could or rather, should, write a review of this show.
0 kommentar(er)
